


Phone Moan

by UkiTheMaid



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Bets, Established Relationship, M/M, Oral Sex, Trying to Keep it Quiet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-14
Updated: 2012-07-14
Packaged: 2017-11-09 23:38:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/459770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UkiTheMaid/pseuds/UkiTheMaid
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So, Phone Moan is a thing. And Bro convinces Dad to partake on it. And Dad obviously regrets that decision (only partially). Written for the first Main Round of HSO (which used the prompt ‘Gambling’).</p>
            </blockquote>





	Phone Moan

**Author's Note:**

> I... actually I have nothing to add. Just that I saw the post about Phone Moan on tumblr, and ended up writing a fic based on it. That's it.

When Strider told him about that whole ‘Phone Moan’ game, Egbert thought that was a really childish and unnecessary activity. Why would anyone risk themselves like that? What was the point?

But then, Strider was able to strike a nerve.

“Bet you can’t stand five minutes without turning into a babbling mess.”

So, that was a challenge then? Who that cocky, shades-wearing guy thought he was anyway? Sure thing Egbert had to admit he was rather… skilled, but that didn’t change the fact that his self-control was something he was quite proud of, and he was more than willing to prove it. Even if that meant he would be taking part of that unusual game.

At the same time, to say that Strider was elated by the fact that Egbert agreed on that would be an understatement. He was regularly trying to get the other man to break from the norm every now and then, to be more adventurous and daring on his actions. And the fact that he accepted that proposition – even if Strider had to resort to a silly bet – was more than he could ask for.

Strider knew oh-so-well that Egbert was a proud man, and that he wouldn’t let that ‘bet’ go without proving him wrong. That wasn’t the first time his will to show just how controlled he was put them in some more or less edgy situation.

So easy to fool when it came to that… Strider almost felt sorry for the man. But there was no time to think about that. Not when Egbert was sitting on the couch, phone in hand, with Strider sitting by his side, fingers mindlessly circling the button on his trousers.

“Who are you calling?” Strider asked with a smirk plastered on his lips as he carefully opened the button at the tip of his fingers.

“I still don’t know… And aren’t you cheating?” Egbert’s eyes drifted to where Strider’s fingers were resting, about to open the zipper.

“The game says nothing about hands. As long as my mouth is nowhere near you, I’m not breaking any rules.” Strider chuckled quietly, pulling the zipper down slowly.

“This hardly sounds fair though.” Egbert turned his attention back to the list of numbers on his phone. Just who he could call that would make this a bit less awkward?

“Oh, so the master of self control can’t handle a few fingertips brushing against him?” Strider teased, fingers creeping up Egbert’s chest to ease the tie around his neck.

Egbert was far from surprised by Strider’s actions, and decided not to say anything else. He focused on the list of numbers in front of him, and finally settled for something. It was the number of one of his ex-coworkers. One not too close to him, but known enough for him to keep a consistent conversation.

When Strider saw Egbert put the phone to his ear, his smile widened even more. God, that was going to be priceless. He should have set up a camera somewhere to keep a record of such a moment, because he was sure as hell that wasn’t going to repeat itself.

Strider was so anxious he didn’t even wait for Egbert to say ‘hello’ to whoever he was calling – Strider didn’t even bother asking who was the ‘victim’ of their game – before sliding his hand under the other man’s underwear, pulling out his still flaccid cock. He then proceeded to lay on the couch, lips brushing against the head before going for an initial lick.

Shuddering almost imperceptibly, Egbert kept his eyes fixed forward. He was pretty sure that if he decided to look down, Stride would do something, anything, to make him lose his composure in the first three seconds of that call, so better be safe than sorry.

When the person on the other line picked up and Egbert was finally able to greet them, Strider was already considerably busy, licking the length of Egbert’s cock, tongue slowly circling around the head, followed by soft sucking motions at the tip.

“It’s been a long time since I called you. How’s everything?” Egbert’s voice showed no sign of disturbance. Not even a little pause. It was almost as if nothing was happening. Strider knew it was too soon for any kind of proper reaction, but he was still a bit disappointed on himself for not being able to get the other man mess up on the very first line of that conversation. Apparently going for the teasing approach wasn’t working.

If that was the case, Strider would have to resort to a more intense advance, even if he wanted to keep that for a later time. Egbert could be really stubborn when he wanted to, especially if his ‘integrity’ was on the line.

Slowly, at first, Strider began to take Egbert’s cock in his mouth, his tongue tracing and licking around the head quite intently. There was a first, subtle sharp inhale from the other man’s nose, and Strider smiled to himself mentally.

“It’s good to hear you are doing fine. I’ve been quite… good myself.” Egbert took a brief, almost unperceivable pause, but he knew that Strider had picked that up, because there was a hum from the other man, which sent soft vibrations over his length, causing him to tense a bit, even if for only a second. “How’s your wife?”

As the small talk continued, Strider kept moving onward, feeling Egbert get progressively harder, until he reached the base, the tip almost touching the back of his throat. He knew that would change as soon as Egbert got to full mast, but he was more than used to that.

“Me? Well, I got someone in my life, but I d-didn’t marry yet.” Egbert cursed himself for that brief stutter. Strider’s actions were getting to him, he couldn’t deny it, and talk about a fitting conversation… “Ah, yes, I know I should seek a stable relationship for… for the sake of my son.” Again, another quick hesitation, as Egbert felt his fingers tense slightly around the phone.

Strider was highly amused by that. He didn’t even start sucking and Egbert’s voice was already faltering. And speaking of which…

The first sucking motion finally happened, and Strider could hear Egbert hold back a stronger exhale. He was starting to lose it, and Strider couldn’t feel prouder of himself even if he wanted to. It was also satisfying that the other man was finally completely hard.

“I would love to… visit you one of these days, y-yes.” Egbert could feel his cheeks flush and his breathing get slightly irregular.

There was a small hint of triumph already building up on the back of Strider’s mind as he went for a second and third sucks, feeling Egbert struggle more and more to contain the sounds trying to escape his mouth.

“No… there’s nothing wrong with, hm, me.” Egbert’s fingers were almost digging on the small phone, as the fingers of his free hand began to curl into a fist. “By the way… where are you working now?”

For a few moments, it seemed like Egbert’s voice went back to its stable state, and Strider couldn’t help but feel a bit frustrated by that. Just how did he regain his composure so fast like that? That wouldn’t do. Strider honestly thought that he was having the upper hand there.

Letting out a disgruntled grunt, which ended up being muffled, Strider started to intensify his actions, swallowing as much as he could and pulling back as strongly as possibly, lips tightly wrapped around Egbert’s cock, and his tongue pressed against the underside.

Then, there was a chocked back moan, and Strider could hear Egbert apologize to the person on the other side of the line, making up a story about how he almost swallowed a piece of gum. And even though one of the ‘rules’ of that game involved not lying, Strider didn’t give a damn about that. He actually wanted to see how long it would take for Egbert to actually let out something compromising on the phone and get the embarrassment of a lifetime.

Yes, that was almost mean when he thought about it, but it was also amusing and Strider could never turn down the opportunity to be entertained like that.

“No, no, I’m fine, really.” Egbert tried to fake a carefree tone, but wasn’t really 100% successful, as his voice was a bit uneven.

There was some more mindless chit chat, and as much as Egbert tried not to make it look like, it was clear that disguising what was going down was being an uphill struggle. He was trying real hard to keep his words to a minimum, and was breathing almost exclusively through his nose, hoping that wouldn’t give away just how messy his breathing really was.

Meanwhile, Strider was quite satisfied, hearing and feeling Egbert fight against his impulses, trying to keep his composure even when it was clear that he had lost it a long time ago and the façade he had up was quite fragile. And when droplets of pre-cum started to build from the slit, he knew he was close to making him drop that act.

Strider’s actions became faster for a while, and slowed down considerably after a short time, the walls on the back of his throat briefly tightening around the head of Egbert’s cock.

“Hm… Y-YES! I mean, yes, of course you can send me those files.” Egbert could feel his ears on fire. That first ‘yes’ certainly wasn’t directed to the person he was talking to, and a devastating wave of shame washed over him. God, he should hang up that stupid phone and stop that. Strider most definitely had proven his point by now.

That over excited ‘yes’ made Strider hum in satisfaction, as his tongue lapped at the tip of Egbert’s erection to get a better taste of him. It should be illegal to have that much fun with something so simple.

When Strider heard Egbert trying to justify why that word came out so loudly, he would laugh out loud if he wasn’t so busy trying to make things even harder for the other man, no pun intended.

“Yes, I’m perfectly fine… I’m just… You s-see…” Egbert hissed under his breath in response to yet another long suck, and the only thing crossing his mind was why in God’s name he was still trying to justify his uneven speech and erratic breathing. It was getting so obvious… He would never be able to call that person again while he lived.

All the while, Strider couldn’t believe Egbert was still trying to cover that up. If anything, he had to commend the other man on his determination. Other people would have given up by now. But he was going to make Egbert drop the towel soon.

Taking Egbert’s erection in as much as he could, the walls of his throat compressing against the tip once again, Strider pulled back in a slow, dragging motion, lips tightly pressed around the entire length.

Another hiss, followed by a broken, but still loud, moan emerged from Egbert’s throat, and out of impulse, his fingers frantically worked on the phone’s keys to hang up. That was enough awkwardness for a single afternoon. From there, a long row of uncontained noises left Egbert’s mouth, and it was as if a giant weight was taken from his shoulders.

Strider didn’t really care about Egbert hanging up. It wasn’t like they were truly following the rules of that silly game anyway. Instead, he kept going, the sounds reaching his ears inciting him to go faster and intensifying his motions. Just by the way the other man was trembling Strider could tell he was near the edge.

And as predicted, it took just a couple more seconds for it to happen, with Egbert letting out two or three curse words under his breath, eyes half lidded. At the same time, Strider did his best to taste and swallow every single drop, a muffled groan leaving his lips before he pulled back, placing a parting kiss on the tip of Egbert’s cock before moving away, licking his lips and with a smile on his face.

There was a pause of almost one minute, where neither of them said anything. Strider wanted to say something, but he wanted to see how long Egbert would go without uttering a single word. But he finally spoke up, and he said just what Strider was expecting him to.

“I can’t believe we actually did it…” He put a hand over his mouth, cheeks and ears burning red.

“We sure did.” Strider leaned back on the couch with a satisfied sigh, lightly punching Egbert in the arm in the process. “You lasted longer than I thought you would though.”

“How long was that anyway?” Egbert asked, pulling the band of his underwear up and proceeding to zip his trousers. If the kids happened to arrive now he would hate to have to explain that.

“Hell if I know. I wasn’t even tracking time.” Strider shrugged, getting an intense stare from the other man. “And who gives a fuck anyway? I just wanted see you do something daring for a change.”

Egbert sunk on the couch, fighting the urge maim Strider. The whole point of that setting was that stupid ‘bet’ from some minutes ago. The only reason he kept going was because he wanted to prove Strider was wrong.

“I… hate you so much right now…” Egbert rubbed his eyes, not quite believing he was so easily fooled.

“Well, I still love you no matter.” Strider chuckled, passing an arm around Egbert’s shoulders and pulling him closer. “And don’t act as if you didn’t enjoy it.”

There was a quiet sigh from Egbert and he felt his shoulders relax a bit, and his face started to feel less hot. Then, his phone started ringing and, when he picked it up to check it, the person he had just called was calling back, presumably worried about how he suddenly hung up.

“It’s the guy you called?” Strider asked, looking at the screen.

“Yeah.” Egbert was contemplating if he should answer or not. It would be kind of rude not to, right?

“Here, give this thing to me. I’m going to tell him that you were getting head while talking to him.” Strider quickly snatched the phone from Egbert’s hand, what earned him a furious glare.

“You are most definitely not doing it, give me that back!” Egbert reached out to pick the phone back, but before he knew it Strider was already halfway upstairs.

“Maybe I can also tell him  _why_  you aren’t married.” Strider snickered, finger resting on the ‘answer’ button.

From that point on, until Dave and John returned, Egbert spend the entire evening chasing after Strider, with him ‘threatening’ to call all the people he knew to spread details about his personal life.

He kept wondering why he had a relationship with such a man.


End file.
